The Tributes Are Announced

As every boy and girl in my district lined up into sad, droopy rows for the reaping I notice that this year we are in the town square which the only fancy part in our district. I am surprised at where they are holding it this year. As I walk in I can see Harper Hays with her feathery dress and the purple hair that looks like a balloon. Every boy and girl is finally done filing in. As I look at the crowd of kids in their farm clothes it makes Harper really stand out, I like to think about my surroundings to keep my mind off of what might happen ahead, getting picked for the Hunger Games. Now it is time, Peacekeepers are wheeling out the giant clear what looks like a fish bowl with tiny fish food in it, but really it’s every boys and girls name on a slip of paper cut perfectly just for this event. This is a nightmare for if I were to be picked. My father is sick and my mom has to care for my 3 younger siblings, 2 boys and 1 girl. Since my mom cares for little ones I take care of my dad.

Now Harper Hays is picking the first name, it will be a girl’s name. It wasn’t anyone I know. I have heard stories of this girl. I heard she steals food a lot in the field and she has never gotten caught. I am surprised because one time I got caught and it caused no food for my family for a month… Oh boy it’s now the turn for a boy to be chosen, i feel the sweat dripping down my forehead. Once I hear my name the silence is broken and i almost had a heart attack, I immediately hear the weeping and crying of my parents. No one volunteers for me as it usually goes in my district. Right away Peacekeepers escort me and they introduce me to my fellow tribute from my district, her name is Jewels Lucky. I can now feel the tears rolling down my eyes and my heart is beating so fast I thought it was going to explode. Now I await in a room in the town hall where people will say bye to me and if I am lucky i will get a token to take with me to remember my home.

First is my mom, she wheels in my dad with her and I could tell that they are very upset considering that their faces were wet and their cheeks were red. I worry that my mom will not be able to do everything. I smell my dad and mom, they smell sweet from our bread shop,  and I will now remember that in my ordeal ahead. When my siblings come in I say hi to them one by one and say goodbye. My sister give’s me a fresh loaf of delicious and sweet raisin bread since we run the bread shop. Afterwards my two brothers give me one of their favorite action figures to be used as good luck. I will endure the challenges ahead even though it will be like walking on nails.

3 thoughts on “The Tributes Are Announced

  1. Overall very well done.
    I liked how your writing flowed smoothly, and gave a good visual.
    However, “I am surprised at where they are holding it this year” was just a comment thrown in there. It didn’t seem to have too much connection to the topic, plus it didn’t really say why you were surprised. It just said that and then changed topics and didn’t seem to flow too smoothly.
    Other than that, I didn’t really see anything else wrong.
    Very well done 🙂

  2. I thought the piece flowed well and was very good. You could have made your attention getter better though because it was wouldn’t really intrigue the reader and make them wan to read on. Also you could have described the girl and if she cried and was very upset or whatever happened. Lastly the sentence Oh boy it’s now the turn for a boy to be chosen” didn’t flow very well and I think you could have changed a couple words and it would’ve sounded better. Other than that you writing was very good and your similes were very funny and clever.

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